Wednesday, April 12, 2006

B'oh Canucks B'oh

With tonight's overtime loss, the Canucks are one point out of the playoffs with two games remaining. If Edmonton wins both their games, the Canucks are eliminated. If the Canucks lose both their games, the Canucks are out. If the Oilers win one and the Canucks lose one, the Canucks are out. Understandably, I'm not terribly happy. I'm even unhappier because I happen to be going to the Canucks/Sharks game tomorrow night in San Jose. I bought these tickets months ago, thinking it would be a good game and I'd get to see the Canucks in playoff form ready to feast on an 11th-place Sharks team.

Well, that's not exactly how it's worked out, and now that I am not driving to the game either, I am considering getting absolutely tanked on ridiculously expensive hockey game beers. It will be an allegory of the Canucks' season. I will start out drinking beers that are decent but not quite worth the money. As time goes on, I will switch to Bud Light -- probably after the first intermission -- and then just after the second intermission, things will look up for me and I will drink one more decent beer. After that, though, things will go to shit and I'll be sitting there stupidly drinking $9 Pabst Blue Ribbon.

Now, I know that $9 is way too expensive for beer, but fuck off, the Canucks might miss the playoffs.

On the other hand, it's at least two hours on the train back to Berkeley, and that's a long time to have to take a leak, so I may have to tone it down some.


The Fed Ex of Funk said...

What happened to your cool and calm reaction to Team Canada's Olympic demise? You said they were playing just like the Canucks. Now the Canucks are playing just like Team Canada, and you're flippin' out. $9 PBR? Buy yourself a sixer at the store for that price. And for the love of hockey, make yourself another soothing bowl of oatmeal already.

Divyesh said...

I hope you got tanked watching us get eliminated. Too bad the game didn't have a better outcome.

Dickolas Wang said...

No, the Canucks played like the Canucks. Suffice to say I had a greater emotional attachment to the Canucks. 82 games will do that to you.