Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Saturday, October 28, 2006

Rare wit

The headline on Canucks.com after last night's 3-2 shootout win against the Washington Capitals:


Canucks.com, colour me impressed!

A little digging finds that this game's recap was written by one Jeremy Lanaway; reading the recap shows that not only does he come up with snappier headlines than the regrettable Kevin Kinghorn, he also writes much better recaps. Thank you, Jeremy Lanaway.

Note to self

It's mom's birthday.

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

The face of the UC Berkeley Statistics Department

Go to http://www.stat.berkeley.edu/ and keep hitting reload. You'll know what you're looking for when you see it.

Good times.

EDIT (4:15PM, October 25, 2006): They fixed it, which is good for the department but bad for me. Previously, the photos cycled through this album.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006

I take pleasure in your discomfort

Those of you who know me know that I really miss my nephew. I certainly wasn't happy to see him go back to France, and I keep pictures of him around at almost all times. The thing about the pictures though is that they only ever capture him in moments of relative happiness. They're always pictures of someone holding him while the whole family is out on a trip, say, or of him playing with a toy or with a grandparent. There were never pictures of the other times.

In particular, I think my favourite thing was watching him get dressed, because he hated that and would start crying and kicking. Also, I really liked to get in his face, because then he'd look away, and then I'd move back in front of his face, and he'd look away again, and so on and so on until he started crying. I also enjoyed hearing him crying while he was in his crib, which he'd always do until he ran out of energy, then he'd start with the weird constipated sounds until he fell asleep.

Now that I think about it, I enjoyed it when he wasn't enjoying it. I'm a bad uncle.

Current Music: Sloan - Everybody Wants You

Addendum (10:35AM, Oct. 25, 2006): He also used to try and chew on his teether toys, but being under 6 months old, if he was holding them the wrong way they wouldn't be oriented correctly to go into his mouth, and he couldn't turn them around in his hand, so instead he would just shake the whole thing and then try again, hoping that it had shaken into the correct orientation. Most of the time, it wouldn't, and he'd cry. Good times. Now he can just turn them around, so those days are gone forever.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Apparently I seem like a chump

I tried to sell my extra iBook battery on Craigslist and I got a very quick response. I was happy about it, but I quickly started to suspect that I was talking to a bot. Finally he agreed to pay me $110 + $3 for shipping materials, and to send me a USPS money order along with a prepaid UPS shipping label.

Then I got this:

From: unitedstatespostal_order@post.com
To: xxxxx
Date: Wed, 18 Oct 2006 12:21:01 -0500
Subject: Order Approved




USPS Money Order of $110.00 sent by [dirty scammer] to Richard Liang has been successflly processed and has consequently been approved. 

Postage Payment Options for Business
Send Money

Many choices for you to send money and pay bills.


Dear  Richard Liang,
Congratulations! The order placed by the buyer of your item: [dirty scammer] to have a United States Postal Service branded Money Order SM $110.00 (USD) sent to you as payment for the item: 12" iBook G4 Li-Ion battery . Payment has been successfully processed and has consequently been APPROVED. The financial details of the transaction are stated below:
(NOTE: All amounts are in USD)
Item Site         :
Item Description : 12" iBook G4 Li-Ion battery

Total  : $110.00

Address Verification

The Money OrderSM will be delivered to your contact information below, Please verify that the name and address (As entered by the buyer) are correct: 



Name             :    Richard Liang
Address         :    xxxxx
City                :    xxxxx
State              :    XX
Zipcode          :    xxxxx
Country         :    xxxxx
Email             :   


If there is an error in the name or address, Please email our representative at  unitedstatespostal_rep@consultant.com


The order has been APPROVED, you CAN NOW ship the merchandise to the buyer's shipping address. You are expected to make the shipment within 48 hours of recieving this Payment Confirmation Notification and get to our Costumer/Technical Dept. with the tracking number for Shipment Verification.

The Money Order SM will NOT be dispatched or get to your resident until the shipment has been verified. This measure is taken in order to protect both seller and buyer's interests and to reduce the occurrence of fraudulent activities.

Due to the fact that United States Postal Service processes thousands of orders daily, United States Postal Service RECOMMENDS contacting the Customer Support Representative that has been assigned to this particular Order directly. This ensures speedy verification of shipment as well as prompt dispatch of Money Order SM. Send shipment tracking details to : unitedstatespostal_rep@consultant.com

Money Order Security Features  

Things to check for to ensure a Money Order is authentic.

Postal Money Orders are safe to use because they have many security features that help distinguish between real and counterfeit notes. Just like our own U.S. currency, they are specially designed with different colored inks, watermarks, and security thread in the paper tip envelop

Hold the money order up to the light and look for the following security features:

Ben Franklin images (watermarks) repeated on the left side (top to bottom).

A dark security thread running (top to bottom) to the right of the Franklin watermark, with the tiny letters “USPS” facing backward and forward

      Also below is the sample of the money order that will be delivered to you after we have receive the shipment tracking number from you.

       If we do not hear from you as soon as expected the payment will be returned back to the buyer. We will be  awaiting  you to ship the item and mail us the shipment tracking number so that we can send out your payment.With this no buyer can stop payment with a false claim that there is no longer any transaction between the two of you after you might have shipped the items.We are your mediator,we stand between both the buyer and the seller because we have our name to protect.
     Thank you for using Postal Money Order Payments® ExpressPayment SM. We look forward serving your Online Money Order Payments® needs in future.

                                                                      "Domestic Money Orders"

*Purchase with cash, debit card, or traveler's check
*Valid for an unlimited period
* Can be cashed at any Post Office or can be deposited or negotiated at your financial institution
*Replace damaged, lost, or stolen money orders.
Thank you for using postal money order. We look forward to serving your online
 payment needs in the future.

Order Status And Informations:

Order Number:

 Payments Order Status:


Order Placed
17th Oct 2006

Order Status

Money order Available

Money Order Approved

Money Order  Confirmed

Billing Information:


Processed successfully

Name on Account
[dirty scammer]

Account number


Services Purchased:

USPS Money Order

Payment for Item




Purchased Item Information:


Auction site

Item Description
12" iBook G4 Li-Ion battery

Number of Item




Seller Information:


Richard Liang

Street address


City, State, Zip




Phone Number



We required a proper verification for shipment, before mailing the reference number slip of money order.

Priority Mail envelope


Thank you for using United State Postal Money Order Payments copyright®.  We look forward to serving your online auction payment needs in the future.


United State Postal Money Order Payments copyright®

Signature Confirmation


USPS Homepage


Federal Bureau of Investigation Banner



Firstly, note that this isn't for $113, it's for $110.

Secondly, note that it requires me to ship the product within 48 hours... when I didn't even have the shipping address.

Thirdly, "United State Postal Money Order Payments copyright®". Right.

Fourthly, there's an ad at the bottom of the page.

If you wanna scam Dickolas, you're gonna have to do better than that.

Saturday, October 21, 2006

Suck it, Nicholas Wang

My PageRank is now 4/10.

I'm coming for you, Nicholas. Or did I mean Dickolas?

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Pimp my jazz ensemble

Tomorrow, UC Jazz Intermediate Combo II rocks Sproul Plaza at 12PM. We'll start playing right when the carillon plays its noon concert, which is good for me, because I hate the fucking carillon1. I may even play a solo.

If you will be on campus, drop by or I'll kick you in the balls.

1. Actually, I really love the carillon, but I'm gonna love drowning it out even more.

Monday, October 16, 2006

New shoes

My old sneakers bit the dust; I blew holes in the pinky-toe sides of both shoes, presumably from my explosive lateral movement playing squash. I finally got around to replacing them this weekend, but I couldn't find a nice-fitting pair in any colour but white.

The thing about new, bright white sneakers is, you can't wear them without feeling like a moron. Picture it in your head; you'll see.

Sunday, October 15, 2006

What's Wang This Month

So I'm real busy lately and so I haven't updated in two weeks. Sue me.

I'm still busy and now it's late and I'm tired so it'll have to wait even longer. Instead, here are a few things that I think would be unsustainable as recurring features but that I wish I could sustain and thus will give them names, and also that I can write down real fast.

Heeeeey brother (Best recent use by me of an Arrested Development joke)

I like [36" pants] because they give me room to expand after a big meal. Plus, 34" pants would generally fit tighter, and I don't think they would effectively hide my thunder.

I was right (Things I say are supported by independent third parties)

Sloan's Between the Bridges, long a Dickolas favourite, is the first album inducted into the Onion A.V. Club's Hall of Fame.

Huh huh huh... you said (Words that are guaranteed to make me chuckle


It can't possibly be worth it (Things that are so big that you get free things when you eat the whole thing, and what I received upon eating it)

The Banana Special at Fenton's Creamery in Oakland; upon eating the whole 3 pounds of ice cream plus banana and whipped cream in under 20 minutes, you receive a free t-shirt. Picture to follow after I finish soaking it in vinegar to seal in the colours and wash it.

Gourd shot! (A record of how much better Adam is than me at squash)

Adam 16, Richard 4

Current Music: Sloan - It's In Your Eyes

Sunday, October 01, 2006

Random quotes from my past, provided without context #38

Do you know how many times I've heard you say "So they're getting into it, right?" in the last week?

And the answer is, not nearly enough.

-- Adam Pauls

Current Music: Sloan - Last Time In Love