Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Naming conventions

I've always named my computers after guitars. Windows computers have generally gotten named after Gibson guitars; Linux/BSD/Mac computers get named after Fenders; laptops get named after acoustics. This seemed like a good idea at the time, but as time has passed and the computers have gone out of date, I'm finding that I'm running out of good names, and my brand spanking new computers -- vastly superior to the old in every respect -- get worse names. My first PCs were ES335, LesPaul, Telecaster, Stratocaster, but then it was on to SG, Jaguar, and Jazzmaster; fine guitars all, but no ES335 or Telecaster. My current desktop is Starcaster, which is really starting to scrape the bottom of the barrel.

Apple probably had this same problem with their operating systems, but they wisely started with Cheetah, went on to Puma, then Jaguar, then Panther. When 10.4 came out and they called it Tiger, I thought "What the hell are you doing? You have nowhere left to go but Lion." But they said screw it and went back down to Leopard, which is clearly an inferior cat. I understand that 10.7 will be called Lion, though, after which they may have to go to things that can beat a lion, such as Drought or Desert Hardship or Two Lions.

Though I already have a naming convention for my guitars, I think maybe it's time to augment with a second one; a second name that can go in parentheses, like the songs on Hail to the Thief. From here on, I shall be naming my guitars after computers. Look at my new guitar, Cray-2. Sorry, Thinkpad T60 is in the shop. Excuse me, I've got to go restring Deep Blue.

It's probably a good thing I don't have children.

Current Music: Mr. Mister - Broken Wings

1 comment:

thea said...

I named my first computer after my favourite ski run, Speed Demon (which my brother made up, since the ski resort named it something far too lame).
Every computer since then has been named "Eigen". I don't call my computers by their name in front of people often enough for anyone to notice.
I would probably use this name for my first child, if I were a person who produced those.